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Health & Fitness

The Marietta Exception to "Read My Lips. No New Taxes."

Mayor Steve “Thunder” Tumlin must have paused at the idea of raising taxes $68 million from the citizens of Marietta for a dubious land purchase. 

As a Republican state legislator, he no doubt signed Grover Norquist’s “No Tax” pledge. Every Republican did. I’m sure the arguments in favor of raising the property taxes for every citizen of Marietta must have been compelling.

Perhaps some of Thunder’s old buddies (OB’s) told him that they were thinking about buying the most attractive piece of property in Marietta and developing it. It has 2 entrances to I-75 (Delk Rd & South Loop) and is close to Atlanta. Thunder knew that Marietta had no undeveloped property like that and surely asked what they were talking about. The OB’s said Franklin Road.

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No doubt, Thunder asked if his OB’s were going to the bank and ask for a loan, based on a plan, some collateral, and prepared to accept the risk, if something went wrong. Thunder had heard the speech at the Chamber of Commerce about Free Market Capitalism and personal responsibility so often; he could repeat it in his sleep. He probably used it in some campaign literature, back in the day. The OB’s must have enjoyed a hearty laugh.

“No, no”, they likely said. “We want the citizens of Marietta to buy the property and sell it to us at a very, very reasonable price. The very, very reasonable price would eliminate the risk factor and guarantee a profit”.

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“But boys”, Thunder must have said, “it will take a truck load of money. The owners of property on Franklin Road have been investing a lot into remodeling the exteriors and interiors, not to mention the many new driveways and playgrounds. They know they have a great piece of property and are fixing up the area to make it more attractive. Even the crime rate is down. Marietta is adding road and sidewalk improvements and new retail businesses are starting up or expanding”.

Thunder thought it would take a lot of money, like a 2 mil increase on property taxes, to come up with $33 million. One of his OB’s pulled out his calculator, with fresh batteries, and said that 2 mils would bring in $68 million.

Thunder asked his OB’s how this terrible proposition could be sold to the city. They said, “Franklin Road doesn’t get much traffic from other parts of town. People will probably think it still looks slummy and has a high crime rate like it did ten years ago, and should be burned to the ground. We’ll play to their ignorance and fears”.

Thunder scratched his head and said, “Boys, we’re getting ready to throw 20% of the citizens of Marietta out of their homes and into the street.” The OB’s said, just add it to the bottom of the November 5 ballot. Few will know about the issue and fewer will vote. We’ll sneak it in and nobody will be the wiser.  

Thunder probably added, “Grover doesn’t care about some rich Marietta Republicans getting richer.” One of the OB’s added that “Franklin Road is 40% brown and 40% black and very Democratic.” Thunder knew that Grover would look the other way when Democrats got the shaft and Republicans got the gold. 

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